Circumstances, Consequences, and Coincidence
by Nightingail-Cross
Summary: Coincidence brings Buck's four year long seach to an end that he never expected. Buck learns that there are consequences for all of your actions, good and bad. Those circumstances can't be changed. And while it may take adjusting, sometimes the journey is better with company. No matter how unexpected it may be.
1. Chapter 1

_**Author's Note:** This is a little something I wrote one night out of boredom. It's a little raw yet. Not sure if it's worth continuing. So if you like it and/or have suggestions please let me know. Some may recognize the Original Character from a story I took down. This story would have taken place about 6 or 7 years after that. Even if you didn't like the other one, please give this a try._

Wondering why nothing ever went right for me I shook my head in frustration. Being honest with myself I had to admit I created a lot of my own problems, including this one. It was my fault for taking too long getting back to the station. It wasn't my fault really. The store by the station had such cute things. In the back they had some second hand clothes barely used, including some that fit exactly. Finding a few things for myself, I also bought him a handsome grey suit with a tie to match. They were so nice I couldn't help but stop and get a few things. With no idea when we'd be back home and have a chance to make desperately needed new clothes I had to buy them. So that was one problem solved.

However I now have a bigger problem and I don't know what I'm going to do. I've missed the train. Without a doubt looking at the hour on the station clock the stage would be gone too.

"Sweet Mother of Earth what am I going to do now?", the words were out of my mouth before I thought better of it. I hadn't meant to, but often found myself talking out loud when distracted. With that phrase being the one I usually muttered. It was something I've been saying for years. It was almost second nature by now.

Busy digging through my purse I set down the bags on the bench. I didn't realize anyone approached until I heard his surprised questioning voice, "Nightingale?"

I knew that voice, I heard it every night in my dreams. Only three people alive called me Nightingale. Not even my half-brother Hawke called me by that name. One of the three allowed to use it was my father's friend, and my godfather, Cotton Thorpe. Right now Cotton was either in Wayford Station or somewhere on the Prairie far from here. The other two men who called me Nightingale had moved back to Sweetwater when the Pony Express ended. They wouldn't be anywhere around here. Or so I thought.

Turning slowly I saw eyes I knew so well. Eyes I had once spent countless hours staring into. The surprise in my voice obvious even to own my ears as I whispered, "Is that really you?"

How long had it been since I had last saw him? Almost in shock I felt myself fall to the bench. Feeling a poke in the arm I looked to my traveling companion sitting on the bench guarding our bags.

"Momma I'm hungry", the little boy complained. How long had it been indeed? I didn't need to count. living proof was right in front of me. It had been a little over four years since I left Rock Creek.

"Just a minute Ike. We'll go get something to eat in just a minute", my strained soft voice trailed away. I wasn't sure Ike even heard me. He was busy playing with his wooden horse, a gift from my cousin Moses.

"Mamma guess what? Guess what?", Ike repeated excitedly. Without waiting for me to answer he rushed on, "That man looks just like me and Uncle Hawk. Just like my papa and gampa did too. Right mama? Is that man an Indian like me?"

"Gale?", I heard the question in Buck's voice. Without a doubt I knew what he was asking. What could I say?

Looking up at Buck I met his eyes almost pleading for understanding as I answered, "Yes, Ike just like you."

"Guess what?", Ike moved on excitedly speaking to Buck. Getting close to the four year old, who never seemed to stop talking, Buck stared in amazement. It was a safe bet that Ike got his talkativeness from my grandpa Teaspoon and me. Although at the moment I was at a loss as to what to say to Buck.

Ike rambled on, never at a loss for words, "Wanna know somethin' Mister?"

"Sure, what?", Buck said looking intently at the little boy in front of him. Ike looked so much like his father. His skin was a bit lighter in color. It was a mixture of my color and Bucks coloring. And Ike shared our dark hair color. However mine was prone to curls while Ike's, like his father's, was straight as a lance. True to the little boy's heritage and as a tribute to his father I left it long. Though it was his eyes that reminded me every day of the man I loved so much I left him.

"My papa was an Indian too. My papa was a good man. Not like that bad man who hurt momma and made her run away. Momma…"

"Husk Ike", I commanded slapping my hand over the boy's mouth.

I didn't have to look at Buck to know that he was staring directly at me. I didn't have to look because I felt it. How was I going to get out of this one? Did I tell him the truth? If so how? Again I was at a loss for words.

Ike wasn't. He inadvertently made my decision for me when he removed my hand and said, "My papa's name is Running Buck and I'm named after his friend Ike..."

The boy's voice trailed off as I dropped my head into my hands. This situation was rapidly getting out of my control. I was afraid to look at Buck, so I hid my face. My little boy was standing on the bench and moved next to me. I could feel him wrap his arms around my neck. Sadly he said, "I'm sorry momma. I didn't mean to mention papa's name and make you cry again."

I wondered if things could get any worse when I heard Ike continue, "She cries a lot over papa. She misses him somethin' fierce."

Whipping up my head I caught Buck's eyes. As I turned to face my son Buck said, "Is that so?"

Ike was nodding his head at Buck when I looked at my son and shook my head no. I was willing him to stop talking. I needed a minute to think. Ike continued as if he didn't see me, "She cries every night. Only my hugs can make momma stop crying. She cries more than me cause I'm a big boy."

Suddenly I was wishing the world would swallow me whole. How could I explain things to Buck? They knew I was alive but none of them knew about Ike except my brother Hawke, my cousin Moses, and Cotton. Occasionally I sent letters to Teaspoon and Jimmy to let them know I was still alive. All of the letters were sent general delivery from various places where Hawke or Moses would mail them for me. Moses was the red haired white skinned son of my father's half-brother Judge "Red" Coultre. We were all wildly different in looks and personality. However having grown up together through difficult times the three of us had an almost unbreakable bond. Whether the men agreed with me or not they accommodated my wishes and kept silent.

Also after what happened to me at the hands of Cotton's younger brother Drake they felt they owed it to me. Their first priority had been keeping me safe. When they found about Ike it became even more important. Cotton swore he'd find and stop his younger half-brother. Until that time protecting us meant keeping silent about Ike and me. So the men kept silent and never said a word to any of the riders. To be honest for a time even Hawke and Moses didn't know where I was. I had gone into hiding to protect Buck, but more importantly the baby I carried.

It was until Ike was almost six months old that I sent word to Hawke. Drake had come close to finding me too many times for me to continue without his help. I figured by then Buck would have quit looking for me, if he even had looked at all.

Lost in thought about the past I didn't realize that Ike and Buck were carrying on a conversation. Buck had sat on the bench with Ike in between us. Ike was carrying on about his wooden horse and how much he liked horses. He wanted to be a good rider someday like his papa he said.

"Does your momma talk to you about your father much?", I heard Buck ask tearing his eyes away from his son for a second to look at me.

"Every night momma tells me stories about him when she tucks me in", the little boy answered. Ike was now facing the back of the bench making the little horse ride across the back. He giggled and added, "Momma lays down next to me and hugs me when she tells me stories. Momma sometimes falls asleep and I sneak out of bed to play with my horses."

"Momma, I'm still hungry. My tummy's crying", Ike stated dramatically putting his hands on his hips as he turned to look at me. The sudden switch in topics seemed to surprise Buck, but I was used to it. Ike was right too, his tummy was crying. It was audibly grumbling right now. Ike rubbed his tummy put his hands back on his hips and gave me his look. That look with those eyes reminded me of his father. How often had Buck given me one of his looks when he was disgruntled with me?

Despite the situation I couldn't help but laugh. He may look like his father but in many ways he tended to act like me. Even Buck, though he had to be sore at me, smiled.

"There's a couple of hotels with restaurants down the street we could try", Buck said evenly. There was something in his tone and in the look in his eyes that said I wasn't going without him regardless of what I wanted.

"Momma, momma, can we go to the Huwnter's Log?", Ike asked excitedly.

Buck arched an eyebrow at me and I said, "Ike I told you, it's called Hunter's Lodge."

Pretty much ignoring me Ike turned to Buck and said, "Guess what?"

Smiling at him, Buck seemed enthralled with the boy, "What?"

"Momma's cousin and my Uncle Hawke owns Huwnter's Log. It's named after my gampa Huwntin Bear. He was the bestest tracker." Pausing for a second Ike seemed to be thinking really hard on something before he said, "Except for maybe my papa."

"Guess what? Guess what?", Ike began again.

Trying to contain a chuckle Buck said, "What this time?"

"I don't say this to momma but I think papa's gonna find us someday. My papa didn't get to meet me." Pausing Ike looked at Buck gravely and said, "Mister do you think my papa will love me a bunch?"

"Yes," Buck began running his hand through Ike's hair, "I think your papa will love you a bunch."

Smiling like he had a secret Ike said quietly to Buck, "Are you goin somewhere? We were, but not no more. Momma made us miss our twain. Now we're stuck until momma can fix it. We've been on a long trip and we was goin' to visit Uncle Hawke. What are you doin?"

"I was looking for something. I traveled a long way looking for it and I've been looking for it a long long time", Buck answered the little boy while looking at me.

"Wow. Was it 'portant? Was it a tweasure?", Ike was all excited. He hurriedly continued, "Must be 'portant if you've been wookin a long time. Was it tweasure? Huh mister?"

Looking at Ike, then me, and back to Ike Buck continued, "Yes, it is something very important to me. I've been looking for over four years for it. Though the treasure is even greater than I imagined."

"What is it? Is it gold?" Authoritatively Ike explained, "Some think gold awfully 'portant, but I think somethin' else is more 'portant."

"Oh and what's that?", Buck asked, which I wish he hadn't. Dropping my head back into my hands I knew what was coming next. It was a little game between Ike and I.

"Momma's hugs and kisses", Ike giggled.

"Yes", Buck nodded his head. Seeming to choose his words carefully as he looked at me, "You're right Ike they are pretty special. Then again your momma is pretty special."

"I'd wook for my momma a wong, wong time if she got wost." Whispering to Buck Ike said, "Though I gots to make sure she don't. Cuz she'd be awfully scared without me. Also cuz there'd be no one to hug momma when she cries over papa."

Slapping my hand over Ike's mouth I said, "Ike that's enough. Let's go get you something to eat and a room for the night."

As we stood up Buck grabbed for my bags in addition to his one. I'm guessing he didn't want me to try running off without him. Pulling my attention back Buck said, "It's gonna be hard getting a room tonight. There are a lot of people in town for some meeting. That also means it'll be too dangerous for you and Ike to stay outside."

Tugging at Buck's vest Ike drew his attention. Smiling Ike explained, "That won't be no trouble for momma. Member? Momma's cousin owns Huwnter's Log."

When I gave Ike a look he paused and looked from me back to Buck and continued, "I mean Hunter's Wodge. The man who runs it always gives momma a room cuz he's afraid of her and Uncle Hawke. The man at the hotel said when riled Uncle Hawke can be a mean son of a….."

"Ike!"

"Sorry momma. I's fogot. Momma can be awfully scary when she's mad too." Ike rushed on, "She don't scare me though cuz she don't get that mad at me. Well most of the time she don't. 'Sides my momma'd never hurt me cuz she loves me. I'm her Little Buck, just like my papa was her Running Buck."

Quietly Buck stared over his sons head at me. Buck looked a bit overwhelmed by his son, most folks were. That boy could talk non-stop and never tire of his own voice. As we walked out of the station Ike handed me his horse so he could take my hand and with the other he took Buck's. Looking up at Buck he asked, "Do you have an Indian name?"

It was nearing supper time and the streets were clearing as people went to eat. I knew we'd have no issues getting supper even if the family dining room was full. Usually they put us in a private dining room because of Ike's skin color. Part of it was because Ike never stopped talking even when he was eating. Now having Buck with us I knew they'd put us in a private room for sure, but no matter what they'd give us food. Honestly Ike was right, they were afraid of Hawke, with good reason. Hawke was a silent partner in the hotel, but was not silent when Ike and I weren't treated right. One man didn't treat us well and he no longer worked at the hotel. One day he just didn't show up for work and no one ever saw him again. The story was that he offended Hawke because of some woman. That was something Hawke wouldn't allow so he killed him. Truth was Hawke had words with the man. He scared the man so much that the guy took up & fled back East leaving everything. Of course since the reputation helped him and because he didn't talk to anyone much Hawke let the story stand.

Buck looked over Ike's head at me indecision in his eyes. Ike's question was still hanging between us. Buck didn't seem to know how to answer. Looking down at our son I answered for him, "Yes Ike, he does have an Indian name. His name is Running Buck."

I wasn't sure how Ike would react. Better a meltdown here in the street than in the hotel. Ike stopped and looked between the two of us. Settling back on Buck he asked with wide eyes, "Does that make you my papa?"

Again I answered for Buck who seemed incapable, "Yes, Ike he is your papa."

"Why's didn't yous come for momma?", Ike asked sadly.

"I tried", Buck said crouching down to Ike the pain obvious in his voice. "I didn't know where to find your momma. I've been looking for her all this time. I never stopped. That's why I was here today."

"Did you know that momma hid to pertect us? Momma didn't want that bad man to find us. He almost did but Momma out smarted him. Momma said yous didn't know about me. That's why you didn't wook for us none. Momma said if yous knew about me yous wouldn't stop lookin' for me never." Buck nodded his head yes then ran his hand through Ike's hair and brushed it off his face. There were tears in Buck's eyes. Oh how I had hurt him. Ike didn't seem to notice the tears. Sounding very authoritative he announced, "I told momma you'd be wookin' for us. Papa, I knew you wouldn't quit wookin' for mama. She told me I was wrong and cried so I quit tellin' her. But at night when I went to bed I pwrays to my gampa and his papa Soarin' Eagle who are with the Spirits. I told them to bring you to us so momma wouldn't cry no more."

Buck looked up at me, but I quickly turned my head away. I couldn't meet his gaze. I didn't want to see what was there. Too much time had passed and too much pain had been caused. I ran to protect us all, but I had deprived them both of each other for the last four years. There's no way that could be forgiven. I had denied Buck his son's birth, first steps, and first words. I wasn't sure I wanted to be forgiven.


	2. Chapter 2

_**Author's Note:** I've had ideas for this story bouncing around for awhile. Partly because I like little Ike so much. He's taken on a life of his own. (If you like little Ike read third chapter I'm about to post.) This chapter is a bit more serious and a bit dark (not graphic just dark). So if that makes you uncomfortable you've been warned. **~~~~~~end of note~~~~~~**_

I wanted Ike to stop blabbing my secrets, but how could I silence him? How could I tell the boy to stop talking? So instead I said, "Hush Ike, quit talking about me. Buck will want to hear about you, not me."

Turning my son's face up to mine I softened my words with a smile. Then with a serious voice I reminded him, "We're about to go into the hotel shortly. What does that mean?"

Sighing loudly Ike answered, "That means I don't tell no one mys name. I'm to say I'm momma's little boy. I don't go with no one but momma, except now maybe papa. And I'm 'sposed to be a good boy and not wander away and scare momma none."

Turning to Buck Ike looked sad and told him, "I was a bad boy one time. I hid from momma cause I thought it would be funny. It wasn't. Momma couldn't find me and I couldn't find her. I was cwyin for her. Momma was cwyin too. She cwied all night and wouldn't let go of me none. I don't like goin to sleep hearin momma cwy. I'm sorry papa. I didn't mean to make momma cwy none."

"I'm sure you didn't Ike. Wandering away or hiding like that can be very dangerous. If anything would happen to you it would make momma and me very sad. So you do what your momma says." Running his hand through Ike's hair again he said, "I just found you, I don't want to lose you. So you hold onto one of us at all times when we're in the lobby. There are a lot of folks in town tonight."

Buck just kind of looked at me. Ike had accepted him without any reservations. He was already calling him papa. Little children have a lot of resiliency and can jump back very quickly. I only wish it was that easy and uncomplicated for adults.

Shrugging my shoulders I reached for Ike's hand. Looking past me Buck said, "Take the bags and switch sides with me Gale. I want to hold onto Ike with my other hand."

Nodding my head I moved not questioning Buck. Quickly I took Ike's right hand and Buck took his left. Looking between us Ike couldn't contain his question, "How come papa?"

Buck was busy watching some men as he hurried to move us forward. Aware of the possible danger, but also of Ike's inability to let it go without an answer I responded softly, "Because your papa is left handed Ike. He needs his left hand free in case he should need to use his gun or his knife to protect us. That's what papa's do. Now hush a minute so papa can concentrate."

Ike was wide eyed but said nothing as he seemed to contemplate this. Buck picked up the pace as he watched the men move away from the wall they had been leaning on. Softly without taking his eyes from them he inquired, "Gale do you have your gun?"

Just as softly I answered, "Yes, hidden in the folds of my skirt like always."

"If I tell you to I want you to grab Ike and run for the hotel. Don't stop no matter what you hear."

"No Buck! I'm not going to leave you by yourself", the desperation coming out in my voice. The Spirits couldn't be so cold that they'd take him away after just bringing him back to us. Softly but panicking I couldn't stop myself, "Especially now that we've just got you back. We need you. I need you."

"Damn it Gale! Ike is our first priority", Buck voice was strained as he watched those men. "Right now I need to concentrate on protecting the two most important things in my life. You need to understand, I don't want to lose you either, but you have to do as I say. Ike comes first."

"Of course", I said softly and somewhat sadly. This may end up being nothing, but I was always scared when Ike was around. I wanted to protect him. Now that we had Buck back I was twice as scared. Ike needs Buck in his life. Hell I need Buck in my life too.

Buck began to move us across the street softly ordering, "Carry Ike."

Instinct was kicking in and I didn't question Buck's orders. My own alarms were going off, but then I was scared of everything nowadays. Picking up Ike I held him in my left arm with the bags. My right arm helped support him but I wanted to be able to quickly draw my gun if needed. I prayed to the Spirits it wouldn't be necessary.

We were outnumbered; there were seven of them against just me and Buck. We also had to protect Ike. Buck's instincts were right. The men began following us across the street. Intently watching the men as they seemed to be reaching for their guns I didn't see the man approaching us from the other side.

Buck did, he grabbed my arm stopping me and shoved me behind him. Ike's head was buried in my hair and his arms wrapped around my neck. He was uncharacteristically silent. Even at his young age he knew something was going on.

Buck began to push us back towards an alley not far behind us. I'm guessing he was hoping to give us cover when I heard the words, "Is everything all right Miss Gale?"

Whipping my head up I looked at the new comer to the fight. He was my brother Hawke's man! Relief flooded through my heart as I called out, "Johnny!"

Johnny was a half-breed around the same age as my grandfather Teaspoon Hunter. He too had been, as he said, 'around the block once or twice'. So there was no doubt he saw the trouble brewing. However the tone of his voice conveyed nothing. He was almost calm, but I knew better. Seeing Johnny look at Ike, whose face was buried in my hair, I knew he would be full on attack mode. Johnny was a good man and would die before letting a man harm a child in his presence. Especially Hawke's nephew Ike.

"Evening boys", Johnny said turning to the rapidly advancing men. "You really don't want to be doing this."

"Oh yeah and why not?", one of them snarled.

"Cause this here young lady is under the protection of me and my boss Hawke des Plains", Johnny said softly but it was unnerving with his deep raspy voice.

A few of the men stopped their advance and a couple even took a few steps back. The one who had spoken and seemed to be their leader came to a stop but did not back up. He looked like he hadn't bathed in days. Gray hairs were starting to pepper his reddish brown beard. Tobacco juice stained it and his teeth. His scars, demeanor, and stance spoke of someone used to a hard life. The kind of man who wouldn't hesitate to use violence.

Arrogantly he said, "Boys, we out number them. They can't stop us. It's just an injun', an old man, and a woman with a kid. I say we take out the men, take their money, and then take turns with the woman."

"Didn't you hear him? She's under the protection of the Hawke. You don't mess with him. He'll skin a man alive, without breakin' a sweat or a lick of remorse. He's a mean son of a bitch you don't cross", one of the men who had stepped back argued.

"Coward!", the leader roared. "We won't leave no witnesses so no one will be able to tell 'im. We outnumber and outgun 'em. It's easy pickin'. Remember no witnesses but leave the bitch alive, I wanna have some fun with her first."

I could feel Ike's tears on my neck as he clung to me. My baby was shaking in my arms and I was desperate to protect him. Had we survived everything over and finally get Buck back only to lose him right away? Before I get a chance to explain myself, before he can hold his son, and before I can tell him how much I love him. How can fate be that cruel?

Buck looked calm, but I could see his body was tense. He was ready to strike at the first man who made a move. I knew when that happened I was to run with Ike. I would do everything in my power to protect my son, Buck's son. However I knew if anything happened to Buck I would die with him. I would live and love our son as best I could, but I would never love another man again. Buck was my soul mate; he was a part of me. The last four years had been agony for me. If it hadn't been for Ike I don't know how I would have survived.

Looking up I saw Johnny just stand there looking at the man. Johnny seldom showed emotion. His face and tone, never seemed to express his emotions. My brother hated playing poker with him. Johnny never gave anything away unless he wanted to. His silence seemed to unnerve the leader who began to fidget. After what seemed like an eternity, but was only a moment, the man seemed to have made his decision.

He looked like he was about to move toward us when Johnny's voice stopped him. Almost sighing Johnny said evenly, "I was really hoping you weren't going to do this."

"Are you scared old man?" Smiling arrogantly the dirty leader advanced. His voice dripping with venom and confidence he said, "We out number you."

"Are you sure about that?", Johnny finally gave a hint of a smile as he let out a whistle. Suddenly men popped out from behind and even on top of a number of buildings. Buck looked around at all of the men and looked at me a bit surprised.

Almost in answer to Buck's unspoken question Johnny said, "Hawke sent word you'd been seen in the area Buck. He asked me to keep an eye on ya'. Hawke knew Gale was supposed to be comin' through town today or tomorrow. Though I didn't expect to see you two together, quite a coincidence huh? Strange how the Spirits work sometimes, ain't it?"

Walking over to Buck he clasped a hand on his shoulder, "You get those two over to the hotel where's it's safe. There's a room and warm supper waiting for y'all."

"And them?", the contempt and anger clearly visible in Buck's eyes and voice.

"What those boys? Pishaw, don't worry about them. Hawke will be wanting to speak with them. They'll be long gone from town before your little man lays his head on his pillow", placing an affectionate hand on Ike's back Johnny whispered to him, "Your Uncle Hawke left a gift for you. He thought your momma might stop by the hotel to feed you."

Ike peeked his head out at Johnny who he adored, "Mr. Johnny, what Uncle Hawke weave me?"

"You know darn good and well what he left you", the softness of Johnny's voice easing some of Ike's fear. Buck was watching Hawke's men silence and round up the men who had threatened us. A few curious people stuck their heads out, but as usual when they saw it was Hawke's men they pulled their heads back in. Some feared him, some saw him as a protector, and some just didn't care about what happened if it didn't affect them.

Johnny and Buck were blocking Ike's view of what was happening. The men were tied up and put on horses. A few that cooperated were gagged but conscious. Others that tried to fight and scream had a hand placed over their mouths were knocked out before they could upset Ike. Hawke's men were as fond of Ike as his uncle was.

"Mr. Johnny is it a horse and a 'tory book?", Ike asked getting a bit excited but still clinging to me. Johnny nodded but tapped him on the nose and said, "No book or horse till after you eat and have your bath. You know your uncle's deal with you."

"Awwww… does I gots to have a bath?", Ike fussed.

"Yes." Laughter in his voice Johnny continued, "Maybe your dad will give you a bath."

It was obvious Johnny had heard the exchange between us. He was aware Buck knew Ike was his. Before the night was over Hawke would have a full accounting of the night. His men were probably in the train station too. Hawke always did like to get news quick.

I also knew why Johnny was laughing. Whoever gave Ike a bath usually ended up as wet as or wetter than him. I should warn Buck, but I guess that's something he can learn about his son on his own.

Buck shook Johnny's hand and expressed his thanks for their protecting his 'family'. Johnny nodded his head and gave Ike a kiss on the head. Affectionately he patted the little boys back and ran his hand through his hair.

"A couple of the boys will follow you to the hotel to make sure you're not bothered again tonight." Johnny nodded his head to me and then Buck as he walked to the horse someone brought for him. Moving pretty spryly for a man his age, Johnny swung himself onto his saddle.

"Gale, Hawke's private room is ready for you. I secured it when I saw you missed your train again", the laughter evident in Johnny's voice. Turning to Buck he said, "It's a bit larger than the others and has a private bath. You'll have the privacy you need and it'll be secure there. Now remember Ike doesn't get his present until AFTER his bath. No matter what that little boy says. Maybe you'll have more luck at not giving into him than his momma."

Smiling Johnny and his crew rode away. I knew the likelihood of seeing most of the bandits alive again was almost non-existent. The ones who had backed off might be given a chance to change their ways and join Hawkes men. However the ones that threatened Ike and me, especially the leader likely wouldn't survive until morning. This was still the Wild West and how things were often done. From Hawke's point of view, it would be a lesson for everyone. One I'm sure he wanted Drake to hear.

Drake Thorpe how I hated to think of that man. However with the events of tonight, especially with what those men threatened to do, I couldn't avoid it. Drake is the younger half-brother of my father's best friend Cotton. Drake was the man who drove me from my home.

The memories of that day still are fresh in my mind. Everyone but Buck and I had gone to town. We fought over something stupid and Buck took off on his horse to clear his head. Drake was supposed to be long gone, so neither of us thought twice about Buck's leaving. Drake however had been lying in wait. Oh how he hated Buck and I, all because I chose Buck over him. That day he hid waiting for his chance to kill Buck. However when Buck left he saw another opportunity. He beat me savagely and tried to rape me. His plan was to leave my dead body for Buck to find to torture him. He wanted him to suffer before finally killing him.

However I survived thanks to Cody's laziness. Neither he nor Jimmy had put away the pitchfork when finishing chores that morning. It was lying on the floor half buried in the hay. While trying to get away from Drake my hand hit it. Seizing what was likely my only chance to save myself I grabbed it. Twisting I stabbed at Drake hitting him in the leg. Instinctively he pulled away from me before grabbing for his gun. Fortunately for me he had removed his gun belt as he was pulling down his pants to rape me. Before he made the connection I grabbed the gun struggling to unholster it. Realizing I had his weapon, he pulled up his pants as he jumped up. He was at a disadvantage because of his leg, so rather than try to fight me for the gun he ran out of the barn. My shots missed. It was enough though to make him run for his horse and leave. By the time Buck and the others arrived back at the ranch Drake was long gone.

It was shortly after that incident we left Sweetwater for Rock Creek. It was supposed to be a new start. However Drake followed us. While in Rock Creek Drake had attacked and nearly killed one of the riders trying to get to me. He almost did. That was when I knew I had flee. I wanted to protect the others and the baby I was pretty sure I was carrying.

Originally I had planned only to be gone for a little while, but Drake eluded capture. Days stretched into weeks and then weeks into months. Slowly the months turned into years. Ike still wouldn't be safe so I couldn't return. For the last four years we have lived in hiding. Changing our names, our appearances, and our location we tried to hide from him. Still he always seemed to get close to finding us. Never staying in one place for long, we lived like nomads or gypsies. We were helped to hide and move by my cousin Moses and Hawke. Cotton helped as he could but spent most of his time looking for Drake. As good a tracker as Cotton was, Drake was just as good at eluding capture. He seemed to like the cat and mouse game.

"Gale", Buck said sharply. My thoughts snapped back to the present I turned my eyes back to him. Ike though was tugging at my hair so I turned my attention down to him, "Momma, papa's talkin' to ya. Dontcha hear 'im? Papa says we can eat now so my tummy stops cwyin'. I wanna go momma, I don't wanna be out heres no more."

"I'm sorry Ike. Yes, let's go get you something to eat and then a bath."

Buck looked at me questioningly as he took the bags from me. Ike still clung tightly to my neck and my hair was entwined in his fingers. It made passing the bags to Buck difficult, but I could see he was in a hurry. In a hurry, no doubt, to get Ike inside where he'd be safe.

Finally getting the bags, which were getting heavy, untangled from my arm we set off. Several of Hawke's men resumed positions around the streets. A few people wandered out of buildings most giving us a wide berth.

"Momma does I gots to have a bath?", Ike looked so forlorn as he said that I had to laugh. Even Buck let out a chuckle. That seemed to ease some of Ike's fears and tensions as I felt him relax a little.

Seizing on that I continued, "Tell you what Ike, we'll go right to the room and get you something to eat. Likely Johnny has already had them prepare your favorites. Then afterwards your papa can give you a bath and _he_ can tell you a bedtime story."

Ike's smile got wide as he turned to Buck, "Papa will ya? Will ya? Pwease?"

As we drew close to the hotel I felt Buck's arm reach around my waist and pull me closer. Smiling at his son his voice became almost as excited as Ike's, "Of course I will. Maybe I'll tell you two stories if you're good."

As I watched one of Hawke's men enter the hotel before us I heard Ike's, "I pwomise papa, I'll be the bestest boy. I'll even eat my carwots. Well… momma don't like lyin' nonw so I's can't pwomise to eat 'em, but I'll twy to. I don't like carwots less theys come right from the dirt. They icky when theys cooked."

Laughing Buck answered, "Hmm.. you sound just like your mamma. I remember her saying the same thing once."

Suddenly I was in a rush to get Ike inside. To get Ike safe, fed, ready for his batch, but more importantly to have something to distract myself. Buck looked at me but I couldn't read his expression. It made me very uncomfortable. Like Johnny, Buck was good at masking his emotions. Far better than I ever was or probably ever would be. Still there was something in his eyes that made me very uncomfortable. I couldn't decide if he was angry at me or not. Nor was I sure which possibility I was more afraid of.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Author's Note**: Ok I had a bit of insomnia last night and so I was able to write quite a bit. More than I thought. I hope you enjoy. I actually have a bit more written and will post when I can clean it up some. **~~end of note~~**_

Opening the door Buck looked carefully inside and when his eyes landed on Hawke's man he let me in. Out of the corner of my eye I saw him give the street another glance before following me in. Approaching us was the manager of the hotel. Buck's grip around my waist tightened but relaxed when Ike explained somewhat quietly, "Papa that's the man that don't like momma none. He called me a name and she put her gun in his face. She didn't stop till she heard Uncle Hawke's roar."

Ike giggled adding, "Uncle Hawke yelled at her and told her shes was naughty. He said that shes not s'posed to do that none. Then hes got mad at the man. You knows what Papa? Uncle Hawke made that man pee his pants. Only babies do that, even I's don't do that no more."

"Ike!"

"Sowy momma", Ike couldn't have been too sorry as he giggled when he buried his face in my hair again. Unfortunately I think the man heard what he said as he looked a bit disgruntled. The frown quickly left his face. He looked a bit afraid now. I turned my head half expecting to see Hawke or Johnny. Instead I was greeted by an icy cold look on Buck's face. It was close to what had been on Hawke's face that day. Buck seemed to take exception to the story and the look the man gave Ike and us.

"My apologies Ms. Irish. The room is ready and I will have the kitchen send the food right up. Also the men will bring up hot water for Angel's bath." Giving Buck a look that showed a bit of fear and respect he apologized again, "Please forgive me if I appeared rude. That story is just a bit embarrassing. I'm sorry I ever acted that way to Ms. Irish and little Angel. I've grown fond of them both and regret my original attitude."

Nodding his head in acceptance some of the frown left Buck's face. Mr. Talwick gave a weak smile. A small pudgy man of Irish decent, his balding head still had some red hair. His shortened stature made his large belly made him look, as Ike put it, like a ball of cookie dough with legs. The man couldn't be much above five feet as he was shorter than me. His rimmed glasses barely sat on the tip of his upturned nose that reminded me of a pigs snout. Overall the man wasn't very attractive and his personality was a bit lacking. However he was very good with numbers and running a hotel. It was this ability and his proven trustworthiness with running the business that kept him employed and alive. Although I wasn't sure if his trustworthiness was a tribute to his character or just cowardice. After his one bad run in with Hawke, I doubt he'd ever have the balls to try to steal from my brother.

Despite that incident Mr. Talwick stayed because Hawke was good to his employees. He paid well and protected his people which in turn brought a loyalty and extra effort from the staff. The hotel was well kept and the guests treated so well that the place was usually full. People were willing to pay a bit more for a clean, safe place with good food and service. That and Mr. Talwick's ability to bargain good deals on supplies made the business profitable.

Mr. Talwick and I had our issues, but a fragile peace was reached a year or so ago. Corrine, his eight year old daughter took ill. The doctor in town tried a number of treatments but was unable to help. Unfortunately neither the doctor nor Mr. Talwick believed in traditional native remedies. In desperation Mrs. Talwick begged my assistance despite her husband's reluctance. Using methods and medicines taught to me by my grandfather Soaring Eagle I was able to help the girl over the worst of it. Then with her parents doting care she made a slow but remarkable comeback. Between that and a healthy respect for Hawke, Mr. Talwick did his best to treat us decent despite his prejudices.

Walking into the room I heard Buck lock the door. As I tried to set Ike down Buck moved around the room, closing the curtains, and checking out the private bathroom. The main room was about the size of two regular hotel rooms with a large bed, a couch, and a table. On the second floor the room had a birds eye view and a bit more security.

The upstairs hallway ran north/south and we were on the west side. The private bath on the south end with its own door into the hallway. So our room had two exits. One in the main room into the corridor and in the bathroom. The hallway door on the attached bath was for staff to enter to fill the tub and empty the chamber pots. That way they never had to come through the room. Neither room was ever for guest use.

I watched as Buck checked both of the hallway doors to make sure they were locked. He then examined the lock and bolt on each door. No doubt the adrenaline was still pumping and he was thinking of how to best protect Ike.

In the main room the door was in the northeast corner. Directly across from it was a large and spacious double bed. Along the south wall near the bathroom door was the couch. It was long enough to accommodate either Hawke or Moses who were both six feet. So it would be big enough for Buck as well. Blankets and pillows had been set up on the couch and a privacy screen put up to separate the couch from the rest of the room. Johnny, as usual had thought of everything.

All of the doors had locks and cold be bolted from the inside. In addition one or more of Hawke's trusted men was always at the hotel. Their job was for general security and to assist the staff. Unless Ike and I were here, then their sole job was our comfort and security. Sometimes it was good to have an overprotective brother. Moses, Ike, and I were the only family Hawke had left besides his sons. Besides us and his men, Hawke didn't tend to keep the company of many. My brother was a bit reclusive. That made us all the more important to him.

A question from Buck stopped my wandering thoughts, "Gale why did Mr. Talwick call you two Miss Irish and Angel?"

"Cuz that's one of ours namez papa." Ike's head had been buried in my hair. I felt him separate it like a curtain as he peered at Buck over my shoulder. Nonchalantly like it was the most normal thing in the world Ike added, "We'ves gots lots of namez. One for all the towns. So's the bad man don't find us none."

Turning slightly I saw Buck's sad expression. It mirrored what I felt in my heart. It hurt me that my little boy had to live a life where having many names was normal.

Feeling like I had to explain a bit, "We use different names in different places to make it harder for Drake to track us. Irish is what my cousin calls me, because I look like our Irish grandmother. I'm not sure if you remember but my father Hunting Bear's white half-brother Red is Moses's father. Though my hair is black I look most like her, except Moses has her red hair. As for angel, Ike kept saying he's mommy's little angel so they assumed it was his name."

Buck looked like he was going to ask a question when a knock on the door interrupted our conversation. A familiar voice called from the hallway, "Ma'am they've brought your supper."

Nodding my head to Buck I gestured at him to open the door. The voice belonged to one of Hawke's men. Buck in turn gestured me off to the side. I was standing directly across from the door by the bed. Standing still I just looked at Buck who did the same to me. The man knocked at the door again. Rolling my eyes I walked away from the door toward the couch with Ike.

Buck cautiously opened the door gun drawn. Hawke's man didn't even blink as he waited for Buck to allow him entrance. The food was then brought in and set on the table. While Ike still wouldn't let go of me he squirmed in my arms looking at the food.

"Ma'am, I'm going to unlock the bathe's hallway door so the staff can fill it while you eat. Once I shut the door from the main room to the bathe room please remember to bolt both while you eat. I'll let you know when we are done", nodding his head goodbye as he shut the bathe door.

Buck went to lock and bolt both doors as I took Ike to the wash pan and set him down. Pouring water into the pretty blue and white dish I smiled as my son intently watched his father. Wetting a rag I attempted to wash the boys hands and face. He was not a happy camper. Like most little boys Ike loved to play and get dirty. Bath time was usually the biggest battle we had. The child had a bit of a stubborn streak. I blamed his father just like my father blamed my grandfather for mine. However I had to admit a good part of the stubborn streak probably came from me.

When I let go of Ike he ran right to his father. Standing still I watched as Buck picked up his son for the first time. Without any hesitation Ike wrapped his arm around his daddy's neck and rested his cheek on Buck's shoulder. Staring at the boy for a few minutes Buck then looked up to me. His eyes were misty and again I thought of all I had robbed him of. How could he ever forgive me? How could he if I couldn't forgive myself? I'm not sure I wanted him to. Somehow it was easier that way.

Turning away I washed my face and hands as well. I really didn't have much of an appetite, but I knew I had to help Ike eat so I could get him into his bath. In the background I could hear Ike chatting away and Buck's soft responses. Walking over to the bed I sat down to untie my shoes. It had been a long day and my feet were tired. Heck all of me was tired.

Grateful for a few moments rest I took my time removing my hat, jacket, and shoes. Reaching back I undid my hair from the braid. Half of it had already worked free anyways. Grabbing for my bag I removed Ike's pajamas and my brush. Getting lost in thought again I wasn't sure how long I sat there brushing my hair.

"Isn't momma purdy papa?"

Turning I saw Ike standing on his chair facing me as he held on to the back. Buck sat to the right and was watching me as well. Smiling weakly as I heard him say, "Yes she is. I almost forgot how much. Gale… is that the brush I bought you?"

Looking down at the silver brush I held I thought back to when he gave it to me. It was, in my opinion, an extravagant purchase. Especially for what a Pony Express rider earned. There were cheaper brush sets and better ways to spend his money. Buck had seen the broken comb and beat up brush I used. They weren't pretty, but worked okay. However one day when I went up to my room there sat a beautiful silver brush and comb set. I had admired the set in Thompkin's store, all the women did. However there were more practical ways to spend one's money, so I forgot about it. Buck hadn't and the first chance he got, he bought them for me. There was no special occasion or reason to do it. He had just wanted to.

Glancing up I replied, "Yes it is. I carried the brush and comb everywhere with me for the last four years. Those two items and the necklace are the only gifts I still had from you. Well except for Ike that is."

Standing up I walked over to the table to see how much luck Buck was having feeding Ike. Food was all over the table, all over Ike, and Buck as well. Unable to hide the smile from my face I saw Buck look down at the mess and shrug his shoulders a bit.

"I've never fed a child before, not even Lou and Kid's", was Buck's explanation as I wiped Ike's face and hands.

"You're doing fine. Ike eats like this when he's excited or worked up about something. After the day he's had I guess I can give him a little leeway", smiling I made a face at Ike as I said that. I knew from the grin on his face Ike wasn't worried about me being upset at the mess. Turning my mind back to something Buck said I queried, "You said Kid and Lou have children. Hawke told me they have two. Is that right?"

"Yes, they have two boys. The oldest is about Ike's age and they have a two year old. Lou's pregnant with their third child right now", Buck explained as best he could while trying to cut up Ike's meat to his specifications. Ike, like me, was a finicky eater. Our son was busy instructing his father on what he wanted in a way that had even me confused.

Reaching down I kissed Ike's chubby cheeks as I heard the knock from the bathe, "Miss Gale, the tub is full and ready to go. I'll wait outside the hallway door until I hear it lock. I'll send someone up for the water later."

"I'll take care of it Gale", Buck said as rising and heading to the door. It was clear in the tenseness in his shoulders the events of tonight still had him worked up. In all honesty I think we all were. Ike was now standing in his chair again clinging to me.

"It's okay sweetie."

"But whys is papa worried momma?"

"Because that's what papa's do Ike. And you're papa hasn't had a chance to spend time with you and get to know you. He's going to be extra protective of you for awhile", I was trying to soothe Ike as he clung to me.

"Momma" Ike whispered, "Do you think papa will love me bunches?"

Buck walked out of the bathroom as Ike asked me that. The fear and concern clear in our son's voice. I could see regret and what looked like guilt on Buck's face. My own guilt was close to overwhelming me. I wanted so desperately to cry, but did not want either of them to see that. Ike was upset enough. As for Buck, he shouldn't have to see me cry. I have no right to cry. It was my fault he was deprived of his son. It's true I ran because Drake hurt Jimmy and wanted to kill Buck. My thought was that Drake would follow me and leave them alone. My hunch had been right they had been safe as Drake pursued me and hid from his brother. However I was the one who brought Drake into our lives.

Kneeling down infront of my son I clasped his face in my hands. Kissing the tip of his nose and smiling I said, "Ike Cross, my Little Buck, don't you ever doubt that your papa loves you. Had he known about you he would never have stopped searching. It was not his choice to not be in your life, that's my fault. I see it in his eyes and his actions on the street. He would give anything to protect you, just like I would. Because you are our child, a part of us, and we love you no matter what. You are my Little Buck, my precious little angel and I, no we, love you more than anything."

Smiling Ike flung his arms around me giving me a big kiss and getting me dirty in the process. This little boy needed a bath desperately. However he needed to eat first, because he was going to be messier before he was done. Buck sat back down in the chair next to Ike. I saw the way he looked at his son. He was overwhelmed and….excited. Knowing Buck would want the full experience I decided I'd have a quick bath first. That would give Ike time to finish eating. Also knowing full well what Buck would be in for. After giving Ike a bath he may not want to do it ever again. Smiling as I thought about how whoever was stuck giving Ike a bath usually ended up wetter than him. It would be a treat for me to take a bath first in a nice warm, clean, and FULL tub.

"What are you smiling about Gale?", I heard Buck ask. Not wanting to spoil the whole surprise I said, "I was just thinking I'd take a quick bath first. A moment to myself in a warm bath will be a treat. That is if you're still willing to finish feeding Ike and give him his bath after."

"Of course", Buck said eagerly. Ike gave me a knowing smile, but I could see he was excited as well. Ike knew full well what a challenge giving him a bath was. The little imp went a mile a minute from sun up to sun down. Barely standing still to eat or bathe. It wasn't until he reached utter exhaustion that he stopped moving. He was just so eager to see and do things, to learn. Ike was so eager to help and enjoy life that it was hard to get annoyed or upset with him. Of course in my case all he had to do was to stare up at me with those big brown eyes of his father's and my heart would melt.

Grabbing my stuff I stopped for a second to watch father and son eat. Buck seemed to have a way with Ike and, of course, endless patience. The same patience he showed with me he now showed our son. Avidly listening and talking with the boy he was engaged with what they were doing. He was encouraging Ike to try a few different foods. Usually Ike didn't try new foods, but when he saw his father eat them he tried them. Silently I watched as Ike seemed to mimic Buck. From the way he sat to the way he was doing things. He even seemed to be trying to sit still. Not that he was really managing to sit still, but he was trying.

Buck looked up and smiled at me before Ike reclaimed his attention. Quickly I went to the bath to enjoy a few minutes to myself before Ike's actions could change Buck's mind.


	4. Chapter 4

Removing my clothes I slipped into the hot water. It felt so good. Using my flower scented soap I washed my hair and body as quickly as I could. A part of me wanted to linger, but I knew Ike would be ready for his bath soon.

Reluctantly I got out of the tub and braided my dark curly hair which went almost to my waist. Usually I hated braiding it because I could never mange to keep it braided. Still tonight it was the quickest way to deal with it for now. Frowning I realized I had but one clean nightgown that exposed a bit more than I'd prefer with Buck in our room. The top was sleeveless with a deep v-cut and ribbons tying it up the front. As was my preference it only came down to about my knees. Grabbing my old full length robe I tied it tight around me like a second nightgown.

It occurred to me that for whatever reason I was suddenly uncomfortable around Buck. We had shared so much in our short time together, but in the last four plus years so much has changed. What happened to me in Sweetwater greatly affected me. As did all of the running around away from those I loved. Running in fear wore me down, fear that Drake would find me and punish me by hurting Ike. Until Ike I didn't understand how much you could love and be afraid at the same time. Ike was my greatest joy and my greatest worry. Until Drake was stopped and Ike was safe I would never relax. That itself aged me more than anything. That and the knowledge of what I was denying Buck and how I hurt him.

Still he forgave me. Somehow that made it worse. By him forgiving me it allowed a part of my heart to feel hope. Hope for us that I had long buried. The problem with that was, we might try to work things out. What if we did and it didn't work out? When there was no chance for us I could hold onto the dream. Besides people tend to remember the best part of relationships, not the bad times or pain.

This morning I had my memories, the 'what if', and the possibility no matter how remote of us. If we tried and we failed I would have nothing but a broken heart. Some said it is better to have lost at love than never to have loved at all. I beg to differ.

Walking out of the bath I came to an abrupt stop and started laughing. Buck turned to look at me a smile on his face. Ike had let out a long loud belch. Turning when he heard me laugh Ike's face went from a grin to an 'uh-oh I got caught again' look. It was one I had seen, and probably had on my own face, too many times.

"Sowy momma, I's fogot." Whispering not so quietly to Buck, "Momma's think yous got to mind your manners. I's don't like to mind mine none. Uncle Hawke says little boyz s'posed to be dirty from playin' hawd, manners are for girls. At least when yous not in public. Also's if the Spirits didn't want little boys to burp then why'd they make burps?"

Bursting into louder laughter I made a mental note to have a talk with my brother. Well, either that or share with my two nephews some stories. Stories of some of the things Hawke did when he was young. Just to give them ideas.

Buck was chuckling but still looking at me with an intense expression. I knew he'd probably be wanting to have a talk when Ike was asleep. He was a talker, always insisting on talking things out. I didn't have the patience for talk. I either wanted to do something or to run, whatever worked out best at the time.

Watching I saw Buck arch an eyebrow as Ike shoveled handfuls of food into his mouth. When properly motivated this kid could eat like Cody. What had Spoony said? I believe he said Cody had swinish habits. Well, my son did too.

Walking over to the table I tapped Ike on the shoulder and waited for him to look up at me. Sheepishly he raised his eyes to mine. Suddenly I realized what I had put my own father through. Crossing my arms I asked as sternly as I could, "Ike, what do I tell you about eating like that?"

Sighing loudly Ike put down his food. I didn't like the look that came into my son's eyes. Usually it meant he was going to say something that would annoy me. Smart-alecky comments were a natural tendency in this family and something encouraged by my brother and cousin. All too often Ike's comments were something my brother or cousin encouraged him to say. Though I didn't let that fool me, this kid had a naughty streak.

Looking all angelic Ike said, "I's to mind my manners and eats like a big boy. I's to say my pwease and tank you's. I's to chew my food not shovel its in. I's to use my spoons and forks. And just cause I's born in a barn don't mean I's got to eat like I belongs in one."

"Ike?! I don't say anything about being born in a barn", I said appalled. Somehow I knew my brother had a hand in this.

"Ike was born in a barn?", Buck asked a little surprised. I saw another look pass across his features. It was as if he just realized how much he really didn't know about his son.

"Yepz, I waz", Ike said proudly. "Uncle Hawke sayz its appowpiate since I's was conceevsed in a barn."

I felt my jaw drop and I was at a loss of what to say other than, "Ike!"

Turning my head I saw the expression on Buck's face. He looked even more caught off guard than me. Just when I thought my brother couldn't surprise me anymore. What else had he told my son? Hawke thought it was great fun to fill Ike's head with things to say that would shock me. Ike seemed to get a kick out of it too. Sometimes it was hard to get mad as I saw the humor in it. Sometimes, like now, it was hard to get mad because it was probably true.

"Momma, what's conceevsed mean?", Ike asked truly looking perplexed.

Buck's eyes had gotten quite wide and his surprise was quite evident. It was obvious he didn't know what to make of Ike, his actions, or his comments. A smile crept to my face and I knew it was probably the same expression Ike had just a moment before. Tapping my son on the nose I said, "Ask your papa."

"Gale!?", was Buck's strangled response. It was clear he was uncomfortable, Buck was starting to blush. I had to suppress an urge to laugh as I turned and walked away. Suddenly I felt Buck behind wrapping his arm around my waist and pulling me to him.

"Don't you walk away and leave me to deal with this alone. I don't know what to say to him", he whispered in my ear. It sent a shiver down my spine. How many times had I dreamt about being this close to Buck? Sometimes the dreams were so realistic I could almost feel his breath on my neck and his hard body next to mine. Then I'd wake up and grieve for him all over again. Buck's voice was so soft I almost had to strain to hear it over Ike who was he humming while he ate, "Is it true?"

Turning to face him because I wanted to see Buck's reaction as I teased him, "What about being born in a barn or conceived in one?"

"Gale…", Buck seemed to suddenly be regretting his question. That just made it more fun for me.

"As for where he was born, yes it was in a barn. As for where he was conceived….it likely was the barn but could've been by the lake or in that Buffalo wallow by the old tree…", I had to stop as I was laughing to hard as his face grew even redder.

"It's not nice to tease a man", Buck said softly.

"I wasn't teasing. I was merely answering your question", was my response in my most innocent voice. It sounded awful even to my ears.

"That wasn't what I was referring to Nightingale", was Buck's whisper soft explanation. He said it so quietly I had to lean in as he lowered his head to my ear. It was my turn to be caught off guard when he further clarified, "I was referring to you mentioning all the places we made love. It's not nice to tease a man and bring back all those memories. Unless of course, you plan on doing something about it later."

Now it was my turn to blush. That definitely caught me off guard and was not something I was expecting. My attention was turned for a second as I noted Ike was away from the table and playing with the horse his uncle left him. Something he was not supposed to have until after his bath. I thought to admonish him but forgot my intention when Buck kissed my ear. Though he whispered softly the pain was still audible, "Gale, I missed you so much. I would never have stopped searching for you. There's been no one in my life since you left. When I gave my commitment to you the first night we made love I meant it. You are my partner for life and now you're the mother of my son. I'm not going to let go of either of you. If that means we move around, move to a big city, whatever it takes to keep you safe from Drake I'll do it. Just promise me you're never going to try to leave me again. No running from me anymore. It's hurt so badly for the last four years. I love you and even though I just met Ike I love him too. Now that I've found you both I won't let go. I need you both."

"Buck, how can you love me? I deprived you of the first four years of your son's life. You'll never get that back. You should hate me or at least be so mad you never forgive me", I pushed the issue and laid my cards on the table. It's what I felt, he should hate me. I didn't understand how he might not.

"When I realized that was our son standing in front of me at the train station I was angry. I was hurt too. I was also thankful you were alive and safe, both of you. Over the past four years I've grieved for you. I've also been mad as hell at you for leaving. However tonight when those men advanced on us in the street I understood why you did what you did. I would have done anything to protect Ike and you in that instant. I would've run, begged, pleaded, killed, and even died. I'd have done whatever it took to keep you two safe", his voice calm but the tone belied a jumble of emotions. Lifting my chin he searched my eyes as he forgave me, "That's what you did to protect Ike and I thank you for that. I understand why you left to protect me, the other riders, and the baby you carried. It couldn't have been easy alone for so long. You gave up so much to protect those you care about. I get that now. Though you have to understand, even when I was mad at you I still loved you. I always will."

Buck's lips moved down and gently brushed against mine. However before he could deepen the kiss we heard our son say, "Ewwwwz. Is this what conceeveds is?"

Smiling against my mouth Buck laughed and whispered, "Can you please answer that? I'm still adjusting to the fact that I have a son who acts just like his mama. I don't think I have it in me to answer that."

Pulling away I went to Ike and snatched the book and horse from him, "No that is not what conceived means. Right now I think you should worry less about what that word means and more about your uncle. What do you suppose he's going to say when he finds out you had your book and horse before your bath?"

"I's won't tell him if you's don't", Ike was grinning openly and looking a bit mischievous as he said that.

Laughing as he came up behind me I heard Buck say, "You may look like me Ike but you sound and act a lot like your momma."

Buck gave me one of his sassy looks as Ike's smiled widened. Squeezing my waist Buck spoke to his son, "Are you ready for that bath Ike?"

"Doez I's gotta?", Ike pouted.

Grabbing his son Buck imitated him as they headed for the bathroom, "Yes you's gotta."

I could hear them talking away in the bathroom. Quickly I loaded the food back onto the tray and set it outside in the hallway. Returning to the room I was cleaning the table awaiting Ike's other favorite bath time ritual. Sure enough a minute later Ike came running from the bathroom naked as the day he was born. Hot on his heels was his father who picked the squealing child up as I shook my head smiling.

Buck gave me a look and Ike patted his shoulder saying, "Don'ts feels bad papa. You's caughted me much faster than momma does."

"Does he do this often?", Buck asked looking even more unsure of what to make of his son.

"Ohh… only on days that end in Y", I laughed as I answered. Expanding on that remark, "He'd run around naked all the time if I let him."

Looking at his son as he walked to the bathroom I saw the teasing look in Buck's eyes, "You definitely take after your momma."

I responded by throwing the towel at Buck's back, who merely winked in response.


End file.
